Eight Compassionate Parenting Exercises

1.  Build compassionate language skills. Play face games: “This is my mad face. Show me your mad face.” Use words: “I wonder if you are feeling sad.”

2.  Accept your emotions and use them to inform your problem solving. Use I messages to describe how you feel about a situation: “I feel worried when you run in here.”

3.  Communicate interest in how your child feels. Listen, explore with your child the deeper meaning of his words:“ Mommy, I hate school.” “It sounds like you don’t want to go to school right now.”

4.  Show love no matter what your child is feeling: “You are really disappointed. Would it help if I held you?”

5. Help link feeling, thinking, and action: “I wonder how that makes her feel?”  “I saw dad smile when you picked that up.” 

6.  Allow your child to teach you how they see and react to situations. Go along with your child's  imagination;  let her lead the play.

7.  Connect your child to the earth and to others: “That toy needs to stay here so other children can play with it." “What shapes do you see in the clouds?”

8.  Practice paying attention to the present moment with the intention of compassion without judgment and begin with yourself.  Questions for reflection:

• What does love look like to my child?  How do they show me love?
• How do my interactions with my child teach loving kindness?
• How do I know what he is feeling? 
• How does she know what I am feeling?
• What is the spirit of my household? 

Posted with permission from Robin Higa